You Know You’re a Writer When . . .


1. The longer you go without writing something – anything – the more anxious you feel.

2. Something good happens to you and you can’t help writing about it.

3. Something terrible happens to you and you can’t help writing about it.

4. You send just about everything that happens to you to that part of your mind that stories come from.

5. You see your life and your friends’ lives as a movie/story, watching yourself and them from the outside, always trying to figure out how to make the happy ending happen.

6. You constantly correct your friends’ grammar in conversation, and their spelling and punctuation on Facebook.

7. Your friends say, “Oh, no! Another long story!” when you’re all shooting the breeze, knowing you have an endless trove of stories to tell, all of which are very, very, very long.

8. Friends are always asking you to help them write important emails, or just the best way to say something important to someone.

9. When you say something particularly astute or profound, your friends ask you who wrote it, assuming you’re quoting a famous author, sort of like in the movie Dead Poet’s Society when Robin Williams recited a poem line, “For only in their dreams can men be truly free. T’was always thus, and always thus shall be.” The other teacher says, “Longfellow?” Robin says, “Keating.” (His last name. It was from his poem.)

10. You no longer read for enjoyment completely, but with an eye toward story structure.

11. Everything in your life – the highest highest and lowest lows – is fodder for stories.

What else would you add to this list?

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